Finding your feet, again and again (discipline and belief)

16 Jan

Happy New Year!

It’s been a while! I’ve been putting all of my energy solidly into MoodMap, and have finally kicked my self up the bum to write a post here.

I hope you’ve all made some great new year resolutions, and striving to keep at them, whatever they may be. Mine is to keep believing and striving (I now like the word striving).

Before I get into what I’ve been doing, to make sure all new readers are up to date. I’m focusing solely on MoodMap – an interactive and engaging app to help people to flourish in their mental well-being, and providing practises and support to those suffering from mild-moderate anxiety/depression.

I’ve put to rest BlueSkies collaboration (blueskiesc.co.uk) to focus on MoodMap – but to leave on a high note I was invited to lead a 2-hour workshop at the Cambridge Conservation Forum Symposium – using the BlueSkiesc structure for approx. 100 conservation leaders and specialists. It was an AMAZING step up, and feel happy to put it to rest for some time with quite a big accomplishment!

So I took just two days off for holidays over the winter period – Xmas day and NY day – so yes I’m pretty tired and stressed, and want to chuck MoodMap in the bin every other day. I’ve hired a developer to make me a prototype (me doing the design for now to save money). It took a LOT of negotiating over the contract for development, which was a week of a bloody load of stress, but we finally agreed on a price which we’re all happy with and he’s full steam ahead.

Because I’ve realised it will take a LOT of money to get the full app made, I’ve had to just go for a prototype with just one of the features for now, and then use this to go for crowdfunding to raise the rest. So once the crowdfunding profile is up I’ll let all you generous people know šŸ˜€

This last month, with a great deal of challenges in costs, contracts, a new co-founder, finding more and more similar products every day, it takes a certain skill, which I’m hoping I’m getting better at — to stand back and admit I’m not on the right path, or I’m going the wrong way, and tweak the direction I’m going in.

This might not sound hard but when it’s you making the decisions, taking the initiative, and ultimately realising you’ve already dedicated 3 months of 50 hour weeks, it can come in blows to realise when you’ve been wasting your time on one area of things, or have wasted a week doing something wrong, etc.

Sometimes it comes to the point where you’re asking yourself what has been the point in doing this? Not a single penny has come in, and things still aren’t progressing fluently, and you want to give up and go back to working under someone else – who can ultimately take responsibility for giving you money, providing you the comfort of telling you what you’re worth, and what needs to be done. And I want to say people working in companies, etc – that’s completely legit and awesome if you enjoy it (don’t want this to turn into some uppity post where I start telling you all that my farts smell better than employed people) – this is to keep my fellow enterprisers motivated – It takes a great deal of discipline, humility, and belief to stumble back onto your feet and realign your sights to the horizon. I think every time one does this they get better at it.

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So- what is this post about again? Ah yeh – so recap on MoodMap – It’s been a tough month with a lot of challenges, unsurity, and heads in hand – really not sure this is going to work, and incredibly frustrated that I’m not generating any kind of income (Except music which brings in enough!).

Even though there’s a lot of doubt in the air my mentors (at the Cambridge Accelerator Program), friends, and my girlfriend constantly remind me that even though there’s nothing to show yet I’m learning an incredible amount about team-building, project management, vision, budgeting, contracts, constructive feedback, and resilience.

I’ve moved back from the Cambridge Accelerator Program office back to my old office with some old co-workers (they keep a desk for me :)), so that I can be away from all the noise and fast pace of the ‘entrepreneurial’ world so that I can sit down with a giant to do list and my sights to my better senses of where the horizon may be, and get it done.

Happy stumbling!

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